Light at the Center of a Hole
Greetings! First off, a shout out to all of our readers across the United States and around the world. Honestly, I’m still a little shocked when I sneak a peek at the different regions where this website is being opened. But it’s a reminder of something bigger: the gospel really is being preached.
Before I dive in, I want to remind people about what we do here at FaithLoveMedicine: we aim to do life together with you. That means we share not just our wins, but our losses. Not just our strengths, but our weaknesses too. Why? Because God shows up in every single one of those places—if we let Him in.
So let’s not stand on ceremony here.
John 3:21 (LSB): “But he who practices the truth comes to the Light, so that his deeds may be manifested as having been done by God”
This verse gripped me on a walk recently. A couple of weeks ago, a friend brought up something that was shared with him from my past that had resurfaced—an episode that took place 3 or 4 years ago, back when I was living apart from Christ. In those days, I wasn’t angry all the time—few would have described me that way—but the anger was inherent to my nature, always within reach, waiting for the right spark to ignite. In a moment of rage, I acted out in a way that left both property damage and emotional wounds in its wake with little to no care or remorse at the time.
Words can only do so much, but I take this matter seriously and know firsthand the consequences my actions caused. Looking back, I’m grieved that I once found a twisted sense of release in destructive thinking, knowing the harm it caused others.
When my friend brought this up, I was caught off guard. It felt like another lifetime—most certainly a different person ago. At the time, I lived with others, so it wasn’t hidden knowledge, though perhaps forgotten. The resurfacing of this incident reminded me that when I lived apart from Christ, not only did I fail to perceive the extent of damage I caused but also how little I cared.
So why share this now? At the center of my life is God—not at the top of some hierarchy of priorities, but at the core, from which my decisions and actions flow albeit imperfectly. John 3:21 doesn’t end with self-effort but rather God working through me. And Philippians 2:13 (NASB1995) echoes the same:
“for it is God who is at work in you, both to desire and to work for His good pleasure.”
In every situation where the Light shines, God is revealed—it’s up to us to choose opposition or partnership.
Some people are in awe of the ease with which I share my past and weaknesses; others think I’m insane. Coworkers, church members, friends—it doesn’t matter. I once told my cousin—who’s still in high school—about my years of walking confidently and unapologetically in evil. His face said it all: disbelief mixed with confusion, like a pinball machine firing off in his head. My friends, when I confessed to many things, responded with, “I would have never shared that” or “I would have taken it to the grave.” And even with that transparency I can’t possibly list it all.
In those conversations, I lean into a posture of deep remorse while acknowledging that the only thing I can do is live better moving forward. That shift only became possible when I gave my life to Christ—it was no longer about me. Before Christ, I had no real desire to live for the good of others or to genuinely do good. As a result, there is nothing from my past I am afraid to admit or share—but I am also no longer a slave to it. I marvel at how much God has transformed my mind. The man who thrived in darkness is no more.
2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV): “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.”
Galatians 2:20 (NKJV): “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me…”
I’ll admit: I’ve avoided using these verses sometimes because they’re familiar—easy to mock by those outside the faith. Many reduce them to, “So you just wake up one day and everything’s fine?” But that oversimplification not only isn’t true—it misses the heart of what they mean.
Salvation doesn’t erase earthly consequences—and I’d argue it doesn’t even make them less real or painful. Take this example: if I murdered someone, no amount of good deeds could ever restore the life I stole. You will always know this and life will never fail to remind you. Two things are certain in this life, that cannot be redeemed: a life lost and time. And because this is true, if guilt is the fuel driving your attempts to live better, it will eventually consume you. But if Christ is at the center—if the One whose very nature is good lives within you—then your deeds stop being attempts at self-redemption. They become the natural overflow of the One in the driver’s seat.
What am I saying? There is no truth about my life that I am unwilling to share. Why? Because Christ is being formed in me daily through the gift of salvation, which I did not earn. I have nothing to boast in. LOL. 🤷🏾♂
I Corinthians 4:7 (CEV): What is so special about you? What do you have that you were not given? And if it was given to you, how can you brag?
That would be like me bragging about how quickly I got to a destination by plane; as if I was the airplane itself. That’s just dumb—and certainly not a posture I will take.
The past is real. The scars left on others and myself are real. And yet, the man who lived in darkness is gone. What remains now is Christ in me. My deeds, my words, my life—they are not mine to boast in. They are the natural overflow of the Light that has entered me, revealing what only God could accomplish. And yet, I still stumble. I still fall short. That’s expected. But even in my imperfection, God’s work shines through. You can reveal to condemn, or reveal to point to something so wonderful that words fail to capture it all. I’m not trying to be a good guy—God is being revealed in me. This story isn’t proof of me—it’s proof of Him. I’m just here for the ride.
Don’t forget you can message us under the CONTACT US link or just email us directly at faithlovemedicine@gmail.com about anything!
